| Forgiving one another | |
| By Randall M. Tidmore | |
| Ephesians 4:31-32 Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you, with all malice. And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God in Christ forgave you. (NKJV) | |
| One characteristic of our sinful human nature is the tendency to hold a grudge. We are tempted to hate our enemies, and speak evil of those who mistreat us, but Jesus says to love them. | |
| Matthew 5:43-48 You have heard that it was said, 'You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.' But I say to you, love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who spitefully use you and persecute you, that you may be sons of your Father in heaven; for He makes His sun rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the just and on the unjust. For if you love those who love you, what reward have you? Do not even the tax collectors do the same? And if you greet your brethren only, what do you do more than others? Do not even the tax collectors do so? 48 Therefore you shall be perfect, just as your Father in heaven is perfect. (NKJV) | |
| Vengeance can be a strong temptation, and some succumb to its allure, but God says that vengeance belongs to Him. | |
| Romans 12:17-21 Repay no one evil for evil. Have regard for good things in the sight of all men. If it is possible, as much as depends on you, live peaceably with all men. Beloved, do not avenge yourselves, but rather give place to wrath; for it is written, Vengeance is Mine, I will repay, says the Lord. Therefore if your enemy is hungry, feed him; If he is thirsty, give him a drink; For in so doing you will heap coals of fire on his head. Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good. (NKJV) | |
| There are specific biblical principles that must govern the way we forgive others. Although they are not always easy to employ, they are not optional! | |
| Why we must forgive. |
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| In order to be forgiven. Jesus taught: | |
| Matthew 6:12 and forgive us
our debts, As we forgive our debtors. (NKJV) Matthew 6:14-15 For if you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses. (NKJV) Mark 11:25-26 And whenever you stand praying, if you have anything against anyone, forgive him, that your Father in heaven may also forgive you your trespasses. But if you do not forgive, neither will your Father in heaven forgive your trespasses. (NKJV) |
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| All have sinned and, therefore, need forgiveness. | |
| Romans 3:23 for all have
sinned and fall short of the glory of God, (NKJV) 1 John 1:7-10 But if we walk in the light as He is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus Christ His Son cleanses us from all sin. If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. If we say that we have not sinned, we make Him a liar, and His word is not in us. (NKJV) |
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| We must all face judgment. | |
| Acts 17:30-31 Truly, these times of ignorance God overlooked, but now commands all men everywhere to repent, because He has appointed a day on which He will judge the world in righteousness by the Man whom He has ordained. He has given assurance of this to all by raising Him from the dead. (NKJV) | |
| How we are to forgive others. The heart is involved. |
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| Matthew 18:35 So My heavenly Father also will do to you if each of you, from his heart, does not forgive his brother his trespasses. (NKJV) | |
| There are some things that must be removed from the heart. | |
| Ephesians 4:31 Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you, with all malice. (NKJV) | |
| The heart must be kept tender. | |
| Ephesians 4:32 And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God in Christ forgave you. (NKJV) | |
| Sin begins in the heart. | |
| Matthew 15:18-19 But those things which proceed out of the mouth come from the heart, and they defile a man. For out of the heart proceed evil thoughts, murders, adulteries, fornications, thefts, false witness, blasphemies. (NKJV) | |
| Man's heart is like a warehouse, where he stores what he chooses. | |
| Matthew 12:33-35 Either make the tree good and its fruit good, or else make the tree bad and its fruit bad; for a tree is known by its fruit. Brood of vipers! How can you, being evil, speak good things? For out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks. A good man out of the good treasure of his heart brings forth good things, and an evil man out of the evil treasure brings forth evil things. (NKJV) | |
| His treasures can be heavenly or evil. | |
| Matthew 6:20-21 but lay up
for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves
do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.
(NKJV) Romans 2:5-6 But in accordance with your hardness and your impenitent heart you are treasuring up for yourself wrath in the day of wrath and revelation of the righteous judgment of God, who will render to each one according to his deeds : (NKJV) |
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| The heart can be trained. | |
| 2 Peter 2:14 having eyes full of adultery and that cannot cease from sin, enticing unstable souls. They have a heart trained in covetous practices, and are accursed children. (NKJV) | |
| We can choose to serve God with a pure heart. | |
| 2 Timothy 2:22 Flee also youthful lusts; but pursue righteousness, faith, love, peace with those who call on the Lord out of a pure heart. (NKJV) | |
| Or we can suffer the consequences of choosing to have a hard, evil heart. | |
| Hebrews 3:12-13 Beware, brethren, lest there be in any of you an evil heart of unbelief in departing from the living God; but exhort one another daily, while it is called Today, lest any of you be hardened through the deceitfulness of sin. (NKJV) | |
As God forgives us. |
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| Ephesians 4:32 And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God in Christ forgave you. (NKJV) | |
| How do you picture God forgiving you? God wants to forgive. | |
| 2 Peter 3:9 The Lord is not slack concerning His promise, as some count slackness, but is longsuffering toward us, not willing that any should perish but that all should come to repentance. (NKJV) | |
| The parable of the prodigal son presents God as longing for the return of His sinful children. (Luke 15:11-32) Jesus taught that there is rejoicing in heaven when a disobedient child repents. | |
| Luke 15:1-10 Then all the tax collectors and the sinners drew near to Him to hear Him. And the Pharisees and scribes complained, saying, This Man receives sinners and eats with them. So He spoke this parable to them, saying: What man of you, having a hundred sheep, if he loses one of them, does not leave the ninety-nine in the wilderness, and go after the one which is lost until he finds it? And when he has found it, he lays it on his shoulders, rejoicing. And when he comes home, he calls together his friends and neighbors, saying to them, 'Rejoice with me, for I have found my sheep which was lost!' I say to you that likewise there will be more joy in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine just persons who need no repentance. Or what woman, having ten silver coins, if she loses one coin, does not light a lamp, sweep the house, and search carefully until she finds it? And when she has found it, she calls her friends and neighbors together, saying, 'Rejoice with me, for I have found the piece which I lost!' Likewise, I say to you, there is joy in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents. (NKJV) | |
| How does God view His forgiveness? As an unpayable debt being canceled. | |
| Matthew 18:23-35 Therefore the kingdom of heaven is like a certain king who wanted to settle accounts with his servants. And when he had begun to settle accounts, one was brought to him who owed him ten thousand talents. But as he was not able to pay, his master commanded that he be sold, with his wife and children and all that he had, and that payment be made. The servant therefore fell down before him, saying, 'Master, have patience with me, and I will pay you all.' Then the master of that servant was moved with compassion, released him, and forgave him the debt. But that servant went out and found one of his fellow servants who owed him a hundred denarii; and he laid hands on him and took him by the throat, saying, 'Pay me what you owe!' So his fellow servant fell down at his feet and begged him, saying, 'Have patience with me, and I will pay you all.' And he would not, but went and threw him into prison till he should pay the debt. So when his fellow servants saw what had been done, they were very grieved, and came and told their master all that had been done. Then his master, after he had called him, said to him, 'You wicked servant! I forgave you all that debt because you begged me. 'Should you not also have had compassion on your fellow servant, just as I had pity on you?' And his master was angry, and delivered him to the torturers until he should pay all that was due to him. So My heavenly Father also will do to you if each of you, from his heart, does not forgive his brother his trespasses. (NKJV) | |
| Forgiving and forgetting forever. | |
| Hebrews 10:17-18 then He adds, Their sins and their lawless deeds I will remember no more. Now where there is remission of these, there is no longer an offering for sin. (NKJV) | |
| Without reservations: "He needs to prove himself first." Is that the way we want God to forgive us? How long do you want God to make you wait, proving yourself before He forgives you? Jesus taught: | |
| Luke 17:3-4 Take heed to yourselves. If your brother sins against you, rebuke him; and if he repents, forgive him. And if he sins against you seven times in a day, and seven times in a day returns to you, saying, 'I repent,' you shall forgive him. (NKJV) | |
| Jesus gave an example from the cross. | |
| Luke 23:34 Then Jesus said, Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they do. And they divided His garments and cast lots. (NKJV) | |
| Without favoritism. | |
| James 3:17 But the wisdom
that is from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, willing to yield, full of mercy
and good fruits, without partiality and without hypocrisy. (NKJV) James 2:1-13 My brethren, do not hold the faith of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Lord of glory, with partiality. For if there should come into your assembly a man with gold rings, in fine apparel, and there should also come in a poor man in filthy clothes, and you pay attention to the one wearing the fine clothes and say to him, You sit here in a good place, and say to the poor man, You stand there, or, Sit here at my footstool, have you not shown partiality among yourselves, and become judges with evil thoughts? Listen, my beloved brethren: Has God not chosen the poor of this world to be rich in faith and heirs of the kingdom which He promised to those who love Him? But you have dishonored the poor man. Do not the rich oppress you and drag you into the courts? Do they not blaspheme that noble name by which you are called? If you really fulfill the royal law according to the Scripture, You shall love your neighbor as yourself, you do well; but if you show partiality, you commit sin, and are convicted by the law as transgressors. For whoever shall keep the whole law, and yet stumble in one point, he is guilty of all. For He who said, Do not commit adultery, also said, Do not murder. Now if you do not commit adultery, but you do murder, you have become a transgressor of the law. So speak and so do as those who will be judged by the law of liberty. For judgment is without mercy to the one who has shown no mercy. Mercy triumphs over judgment. (NKJV) |
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| We can not afford to be stingy with our mercy. |
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| Matthew 5:7 Blessed are the
merciful, For they shall obtain mercy. (NKJV) Matthew 18:21-22 Then Peter came to Him and said, Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? Up to seven times? Jesus said to him, I do not say to you, up to seven times, but up to seventy times seven. (NKJV) |
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| When one asks for forgiveness, we better forgive, without looking to see who it is, or how we feel about. Someone may ask, How do you know if he has really repented? You don't! That is not our department. | |
| Luke 17:3-4 Take heed to yourselves. If your brother sins against you, rebuke him; and if he repents, forgive him. And if he sins against you seven times in a day, and seven times in a day returns to you, saying, 'I repent,' you shall forgive him. (NKJV) | |
| Only God judges the heart. | |
| 1 Samuel 16:7 But the LORD said to Samuel, Do not look at his appearance or at the height of his stature, because I have refused him. For the Lord does not see as man sees; for man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart. (NKJV) | |
| If someone deceives us, they do not deceive the Lord. | |
| Galatians 6:7-8 Do not be deceived, God is not mocked; for whatever a man sows, that he will also reap. For he who sows to his flesh will of the flesh reap corruption, but he who sows to the Spirit will of the Spirit reap everlasting life. (NKJV) | |
| We will not be condemned for forgiving an insincere brother. However, we will be condemned for failing to forgive others. Let us clean our hearts from all malice and hard feelings, and forgive others as God has forgiven us. | |
| Ephesians 4:31-32 Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you, with all malice. And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God in Christ forgave you. (NKJV) | |
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